Today I was due to fly back to Barcelona to start, again, the North to South run, amble, trip thing.
Plans change, life happens, and I’ve found other things to hold my focus whilst still keeping in sight my original plan.
Since returning after a short stint running along the GR2 (La Jonquera to Aiguafreda) and part of GR5 (Aiguafreda to Montserrat) I’ve had to think long and hard about what to do, what is the right thing.
Given that I gave everything up to do this trip I came back into uncertainty, it has not been pretty, it’s been rough.
I’ve had days where I’ve felt completely lost and have hidden myself away in my own self pity.
Spending time trying to get yourself on your feet is not an easy task when the reason you are in the situation is mostly down to your own choices. Looking at yourself and owning the mistakes you made is like looking in the mirror after a really heavy night of debauchery.
Don’t get me wrong, Spain wasn’t a bad choice, but how I went about it was far from perfect, I hurt someone close to me. I don’t believe in regrets, I chose to go, I picked my path and I live with that.
Obvisouly I couldn’t have forseen the tooth saga, seriously the last thing I thought during a run of 1100miles across mountains and plains of Spain is teeth being the reason I didn’t finish.
Lots of work to be done to pay for new teeth…..whatever work comes my way I am taking it (within reason of course).
Going back to basics again, starting afresh. Moving out, new job, new friends. Building myself back up, figuring things out along the way.
Still the fact there’s an empty seat with my name on a flight today makes me a little bit sad.
Stuff happens. Onwards.